


Birthday Wishes

by peblezQ



Series: Hamilton Week - Lams Birthday Bash [11]
Category: 18th Century CE RPF, American Revolution RPF, Hamilton - Miranda, Historical RPF
Genre: Angst, Birthday, Birthday Presents, Bittersweet Ending, Boys Kissing, Character Turned Into a Ghost, Fluff, Implied/Referenced Cheating, Lost Love, M/M, Prompt Fic, Secret Relationship, ghost fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-12
Updated: 2021-01-12
Packaged: 2021-03-16 07:22:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 697
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28702866
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/peblezQ/pseuds/peblezQ
Summary: Hamilton sits alone in his office on the 11th of January, 1795 - and makes a birthday wish.Prompt #11 - Birthday
Relationships: Alexander Hamilton/John Laurens
Series: Hamilton Week - Lams Birthday Bash [11]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2086494
Comments: 12
Kudos: 35
Collections: Lams Birthday Bash





	Birthday Wishes

**Author's Note:**

> Howdy! We did it fam. I wrote a fic every day for 11 days.
> 
> I actually decided to keep this challenge for myself. I will write at least an opening or closing paragraph every single day for the rest of the month, and hopefully, carry it on every day afterwards so that I can keep up the habit of writing every day without the expectation of posting every day.
> 
> I won't post fics every day anymore (I will do Laurens Week in October but I might pre-write the fics for that.) but otherwise - I will be doing the challenge solely for myself.
> 
> In the meantime, enjoy the long fanfic that I am working to complete and enjoy any possible short stories I like enough to share (:
> 
> I hope you enjoy the Lams angst I have prepared for you on Alexander Hamilton's (264th or 266th) birthday!

The candle burns on the small pastry he had bought on his way to work that morning. He sits alone in his office, long after many have retreated to their homes for the eve, but Hamilton remains. His birthday happened to fall upon a week where Eliza and the children have visited her father. Not quite  _ 'visiting' _ but truly, she had left to stay with her father to rethink everything after he confessed to his affair from two years previous. 

So now he sits alone in his office. He will be leaving in a few short weeks to resume his Law firm and he sits alone. He stares at the flame and wishes for something selfish.

Not for Eliza. Not for his children. Not for his dearest friends and family. Hamilton closes his eyes and blows out the candle, wishing for John Laurens.

He is engulfed in the inky blackness, consumed by his racing thoughts of the past. He longs for his touch, to hear his voice again, and to smell his musk as they embrace. Hamilton wishes he could have this one thing, but fears that if he may open his eyes, he will see nothing because he knows better. He knows Laurens is dead.

Hamilton sighs and opens his eyes, squinting in the dark as he plucks the candle out of the pastry before taking a bite. The velvety chocolate melts in his mouth, leaving him moaning at the delectable value of the tiny cake he bought for one.

"Happy birthday, Alexander." Hamilton chokes on the little cake and looks around frantically in his dark office for the source of the mysterious voice. He lights a piece of flint and ignites the small candle from his birthday pastry.

Hamilton nearly falls from his chair, breathing deeply as he stares owlishly at Laurens. His face is lit only by the birthday candle flame, strange shadows dancing across his skin as if he were made of flesh and bone. He be clothed in his uniform, looking sharp and tidy with his golden blonde hair tied into a neat queue behind his broad shoulders. His smile is alluring, transfixing Hamilton into a daze of wonders as he falls deep into his crystal blue eyes. 

"John?" Hamilton breathes out softly, his eyebrow quirking up.

He leans against the desk, looking down at Hamilton with a strange expression, his lips curling downwards. "Alexander, you made the right choice to tell her."

Hamilton sighs. "I know. It still hurts, my dear."

Laurens smiles and carefully watches his hand as he hesitantly reaches out. Hamilton watches with bated breath as he slides his hand over Alexander's with such care. Laurens' hand is warm and dry; his hand even be clammy as if he is nervous. Like he is alive.

"You came," Hamilton whispers, astonished.

Laurens' smile melts into an affectionate grin and he leans over the desk. Hamilton leans up subconsciously, closing his eyes and basking in his scent of oak, coffee, and honey. He smiles into John's lips, moving in tandem and standing up for better access.

"I love you," Hamilton breathes against his jaw and shivers when John traces his fingers along his arms and wraps him in an awkward embrace over the desk. Hamilton presses his lips to his again hungrily and moans as he reciprocates with as much fiery passion as himself.

Laurens breathes against his cheek through his nose as he tilts his head to deepen the kiss. Hamilton drops the birthday candle onto his ashtray before wrapping his arms around Laurens, pulling him closer, despite the desk between them. 

And just as soon as he had appeared, he was gone with the flame as the breeze blew it away. Hamilton feels a brisk chill, shuddering as the air around him shows no lingering sign of life. He fumbles to grab the candle and re-lights the flame but finds his office cold and devoid of anyone other than his lonesome self.

Hamilton stares wordlessly at the small birthday candle and smiles hesitantly. "Thank you," he whispers with his eyes closed. He blows out the candle again and has once again returned to his dark, melancholy office.

_ Alone. _

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> I genuinely Googled when putting candles on birthday cakes became a thing. The first well-documented case of candles being placed on a birthday cake comes from Germany in 1746. A man named Count Ludwig von Zinzendorf held a lavish birthday celebration at his home which included a large cake with candles stuck into it, and the number of candles corresponded to his age.
> 
> So yes, it is plausible for Hamilton to have a candle on a cake for his birthday in 1795. Would have been a fairly recent practice at the time, but still plausible. ~bows before receding into my cave~


End file.
